The SPCA
all stray zombies are taken to the spca and held for three days, seven days with identification. most fresh zombies who haven’t been embalmed tend to spoil within 72 hours, so they have to move those who are formaldehyde-challenged out pretty quick before a rectal cavity bursts. trust me, you don’t want to be around when that happens.
my stay at the spca wasn’t all that bad. they put me in my own cage in the zombie kennel, complete with a bowl of water and a rawhide bone to chew on. they even gave me my own litter box, which isn’t all that easy to use, if you want to know the truth.
if you’ve never tried squatting naked over a litter box with one useless ankle and one useless arm while other animated rotting corpses in adjacent cages stare at you, then you probably wouldn’t understand.
fortunately, my parents claimed me after two days. the stigma of claiming your undead son and bringing him home to live with you can wreak havoc on your social status, so i can’t exactly blame mom and dad for not rushing out to get me, but one more day and i would have been a crash test dummy.
not all of the dead who reanimate have relatives or friends who can take them in. most don’t. and without a host guardian, zombies eventually get turned over to the county for salvage and redistribution or used for medical research, like impact testing.
the spca is working to implement a companion zombie program and solicit more zombie foster volunteers, but those ideas haven’t exactly caught on yet.
